Santa's Slay (2005)
Directed by: David Steiman
Starring: Bill Goldberg, Douglas Smith and Emilie de Ravin
- He's making a list... pray you're not on it.
- Spreading holiday fear this Christmas.
- Santa Claus: I'm Santa Claus, not Dracula!
- Santa Claus: Looks like Grandpa got run over by a reindeer.
- Santa Claus: [while reading a copy of the book 'A Christmas Carol' in the school library] Boy, Christmas can sure scare the Dickens out of people.
- Virginia Mason: Santa?
Santa Claus: Yes, Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus!
- Gwen Mason: [panicked, desperately] I've been good!
[Santa hits her with a table leg]
- Nicholas Yuleson: The clock just struck midnight at the pole. Christmas is officially over for you, Santa!
Santa Claus: You know, most people make the same mistake. The correct time at the pole is completely discretionary, because the poles are where all the time zones actually converge.
Mary "Mac" Mackenzie: He's scary, yet educational.
- Santa Claus: Ho, ho...
[oogles topless waitress as she walks past him]
Santa Claus: [lustily] HO...
- Mary "Mac" Mackenzie: You hit like a girl.
Nicholas Yuleson: You kiss like a guy.
- Nicholas Yuleson: We're trapped in closet on Christmas with Santa trying to murder us. How fucked up is that?
- Santa Claus: Christmas is over when I say it's over!
This film is about Santa Claus who is actually a demon who lost a bet with an Angel, so he becomes the giver of toys and happiness. But when the bet is off, he returns to his evil ways. "Santa's Slay" is exacly what the title says, Santa Claus running around slaying people. It starrs former WWE wrestler Bill Goldberg a.k.a Tha Man as Santa Claus, meaning you get one big santa on steroids running around killing and people.
I found this film very funny at times quite stupid. It works but at the same time it doesnt work. It is not really a b-movie (although the acting has the quality of one), it is a bigger budget movie with celebrety cameos (Chris Kattan, Tommy "Tiny" Lister). It is just plane entertaining and is one christmas movie made for the holidays...
If you want a different Xmas movie, you should check this one out.
I give it 6.5/10 pukes.
It is just fun to watch Santa Clause chase, fight and kill to cheesy Christmas tunes...